Friday, June 03, 2005
for once, please.
Is it ever ok to lie to someone you love?
Telling a lie is a double edged sword. You may use it today to cut ties, responsibilities and burdens but one day, it might just come back to cut you and haunt you for forevermore. perhaps one day you will wake up, regreting the strong words u used on him, missing his company and the good times, but please oh please, at that very moment, don't forget about the way he put you down and manipulated you as if you were a little puppet. I know it is healthy to remember the happy times and forget about the ugly ones, but there is a lesson to be learnt from all the skinned knees in life. All you can do is pick yourself up and move on. That is what adults do, adults who are rational and mature. And those are things he has yet to fully learn and understand judging from his behavior in this whole debacle. He might have been all you had for a very very long time (in teenage terms), but there will be more who will sweep you off your feet and show you how it is like to really love and be loved.
There is always the risk that you will not be able to retrieve what you lost, but if that is what it takes to extract yourself out of a sticky and gruesome situation, then i say, so be it. Yes, gruesome. It is not an understatement.
why don't you stand up for YOURself, think of YOUR own happiness, love YOURself and preserve YOUR sanity for once?? does it pay to be so nice to a guy who is causing you endless trauma, tears and heartache? The answer is staring you in the face.
"you have to be cruel to be kind..."By telling him it's over, you allow the healing process to begin. But you must be clear. There is no point being tactful and nice and accomodating and even, dare I say it, honest. So what if you still have feelings for him? Since you have made up your mind that you will only go back to him if Hell freezes over, then there is no point complicating the situation. Perhaps even, there is no need to lie. Just lay down the bare facts, so he has nothing to mull over and nitpick. There is no need to disclose of any further information. And then leave. And don't pick up his calls for at least a couple of months.
Why do you care so much about what people think? To quote from A Good Woman, "If you care so much about what other people think, what is the point of having thoughts of your own?" People will always believe what they want to believe. If your friends believe in you and your character, they will stand by you no matter what. If they don't, why bother with them? Why are you letting your community define you as a person?
Girl, whatever he said will blow away in time, if you end it once and for all. But if you don't, i fear for your mental health and your happiness. Cuz that is all that matters to me. That you are satisfied and happy with the way you are living your life. Why do you think i gave up telling you that he wasn't good enough for you during those long years that you weathered? It's just cuz i knew that being with him was enough for you and nothing else mattered.
Whatever you decide, i will be here for you. Take care, love ya. =)
insatiable at 1:45 AM
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